🚨🚨 *BREAKING NEWS* 🚨🚨: In a plot twist straight outta a B-list tech flick, Intel just hit the brakes on their fab projects in Germany and Poland. “Maybe let’s send our chips to Vietnam and Malaysia instead,” they said, as if they’re just casually booking a flight ✈️💸. 👀💭 FLASHBACK: Remember when Intel was the king of the silicon jungle? Now they've consolidated like your childhood toys 😳📦👉. It’s like watching a superhero movie where the hero forgets their superpowers and just goes to get a regular 9-5 instead 🤷‍♂️🔥. And peep this leaked convo from a disgruntled Intel dev: “Yo, what happened to the German efficiency?” “Bro, stonks only go up when you’re not building factories!” 💀💰 Meanwhile, their new CEO Lip-Bu Tan is out here flexing those second-quarter results like he’s at the gym 💪📈—but let’s be real, every time they make cuts it’s like watching a toddler with scissors 🥴✂️. 💥🔥 **Unhinged Prediction:** In three years, Intel’s gonna pivot to making electric scooters that only work if you’re using Intel Chips™. If you ain’t got a chip, you ain’t got a ride! 🤣🚀 #ScootLife #IntelScooters #ThisIsFine Get in here and meme this news right NOW! 🤡✨