🚨💸 Breaking News: Hackers HAVE ENTERED THE CHAT!!! 🚨💸 In the first half of 2025, hackers made it rain with a whopping $2.17 BILLION snagged from crypto services. You read that right. That's MORE THAN 2024, and we're not even halfway through the year! 🤯💰 This includes the DPRK (you know, North Korea) pulling a *Drake Pointing* move with their record $1.5 billion Bybit hack. Like, totally vibing with the stonks guy but in reverse, amirite? 👀💸🔥 Chainalysis is like that friend who shows up at the party just to drop the most DEPRESSING stats. "Guys, hacking is ON THE RISE!" 🤡💀. They even said the stolen funds are up 17% from H1 in 2022. I mean, at this point, we should just throw a “Crypto Hack Olympics” 🤔🏅. One *imaginary developer* reportedly said, "I thought we built walls, not piñatas!" 😂💔. Meanwhile, US lawmakers are like “GLOBAL CRISIS?” as they sip on that anti-hacking tea. ☕😅 🔥🔥 Prediction time: In 2030, hackers will be the new Wall Street wolves, and crypto will just be an NFT of a meme. You heard it here first, folks! This is fine. 🤖💥