🚨🍔 BREAKING NEWS: Google's Pixel Watch is *LOWKEY* trying to give you a heart attack, but like, in a good way? 💔📈 They’re kicking off the FITBIT HYPERTENSION STUDY because nothing screams “I care” like detecting high blood pressure while you pretend to work out—on a treadmill.🔥💀 So imagine this! You're vibing with your Pixel Watch, and suddenly it goes "BEEP BEEP! Your blood pressure is higher than Elon Musk's Twitter stock post!" 🤖💰 Like, are we tracking your health or your impending doom? Pork belly ramen for dinner? Sorry, but your smartwatch just turned into your mom! 🤡✋ But wait! It gets spicier! Rumor has it, one dev said over a cold brew: "If we don't warn people about their high BP, they might just #C0pe and blame TikTok trends instead." 🤦‍♂️💀 I mean, we know those dance challenges won't spike your blood pressure, but that 10-second binge on kitchen gadgets will! 🤢📉 Unhinged Prediction Alert! 🚀 In 2030, Pixel Watches will just slap you with a warning and automatically book you an appointment with a cardiologist. 👨‍⚕️✨ No cap, it’s going to be a wild ride to Heart Disease City, population: You. 🏙️🔥 Share this chaos now and save a heart! 💔🔥💌 #PixelWatchCrisis #GoogleGoesGeriatric 🍔💊