🚨 BREAKING NEWS: Google’s new “How Old Are Ya?” AI is here, and it’s about to ruin your internet life faster than your Aunt Karen at Thanksgiving! 🍗💀💌 You heard it here first, fam! Google’s diving deep into your search history like it’s the last slice of pizza at a party 🍕🤖, trying to figure out if you’re *old enough* to look at memes or if you still think SpongeBob is the epitome of comedy! 🤡💥 “Why don’t we just ask them?” said a *totally real* Google developer in a leaked convo, “Nah, let’s just stalk their entire life! 🤔💻” If the AI thinks you’re under 18, get ready for a corporate love letter (aka an email) telling you how to live your online life! It’s like being grounded but without the cool snacks. 🚫🍭 Corporations holding our hands like, “This is fine” as they lead us directly into the cringe zone! But let’s be real, Google? 🤨 If I wanted to be told I’m too young for memes or *shouldn’t* watch 10 hours of cat videos, I’d just visit my grandma. 🤦‍♂️ 🔥🔥 Here’s an insane prediction: One day, Google will make your age based on how often you say “bet” in your searches. If you exceed a certain limit, congrats! You’re 93 years old. 🚀💰 So buckle up, my friends; the future is wild. Who’s ready to seethe over algorithmic ageism? Stonks! 📈💀