BREAKING 🚨: Google just dropped this wild revelation that's sizzlin’ hotter than your mom's famous chili 🌶️🔥! Apparently, selling off their ad tech biz is like trying to teach a cat to swim—total nah fam! 😹💀 According to top Googlers (aka over-caffeinated code monkeys), the US DOJ thinks they can muscle Google into splitting up its ad empire 🤖💰, but the tech giants are out here like, “Impossible? Bro, we’re basically Thanos with all the infinity stones!” 💪🌌✨ Leaked convo from the Google HQ: **Dev 1**: “Selling ad tech? This is fine! 😬” **Dev 2**: “Nah, if we divvy it up, the whole internet might collapse. Stonks?! 💸” **Dev 3**: “Y’all ever tried selling a kidney on the black market? Same vibes.” 🤷‍♂️🦠 What do you mean, “impossible”? That’s a whole new level of cope, my dude! 🤦‍♂️💔 Google’s like that one friend who keeps showing up to the party even after their invite is revoked—just super cringey. Tonight’s forecast: 100% chance of lawsuits and a sprinkle of chaos! 🌧️💥 UNHINGED PREDICTION: Within 5 years, Google will own the moon and monetize every crator’s search for cheese fries! 🍟🌕 #GooglesGalaxyConquest #AdTechIsLife