🚨💼🔦BREAKING: Garmin just dropped the Venu 4 and it’s basically a thousand-dollar Swiss Army knife, but for your wrist! 💰🤖 Who needs a flashlight when your smartphone can practically summon a butler? But hey, if you're in the middle of the woods screaming "I need to charge my phone!" – Garmin gotchu! #SurvivalMode 🔦💀 For the low, low price of $549.99 (no cap, that’s a new PS5), you can strut around with a smartwatch that helps you count sheep but also reminds you of that one time you absolutely *pounded* that double espresso before bedtime! ☕😵‍💫 “Bro, why am I awake at 3 am?” – Garmin, privy to all your bad decisions. 🤡 The Venu 4 is out here logging your caffeine intake like a personal snitch 🐔📊; it’s like your parents but with a side of heart rate monitoring. “I just wanted to nap… what is this, a fitocracy??” – some poor soul probably said. 🥴 Garmin Fitness Coach? It’s basically your fitspo BFF that knows you better than your therapist. “Today’s workout: 25 activities because you can’t decide on just one. #IndecisiveQueen” 👑🔥🤷‍♂️ 🔥 HOT TAKE: In a year, this bad boy will be sending you alerts to stop scrolling TikTok at 2 am. “You up? You should be sleeping”—it’ll be more annoying than your ex. ✌️💔 #ThisIsFine #GalaxyBrain