🎉🔥 Welcome to the greatest circus of geekery at TechCrunch Disrupt 2025, where VC vibes are hella contagious like the flu but with way more stonks! 💰🚀 Enter Elad Gil, the wizard of early-stage investing! Imagine if Elon Musk and Gandalf had a baby, and that baby was a spreadsheet-wielding, meme-loving tech guru. 👶✨ Straight from the epic combo of "How to Invest 101" and "Silicon Valley Season 1", he’s dropping knowledge bombs on how to sniff out the next big thing before it goes viral like cat pics! 🐱💥 You want to know how to play the stonk market? Well, buckle up, buttercup! Elad’s got the cheat codes to frontier tech, and it's hotter than a Jordan Peele horror movie! 🔥📈 👉 "If you throw enough darts at a board, one of them will hit a unicorn," Elad allegedly said (totally not a direct quote!), while sipping his overpriced oat milk latte. ☕ Who needs strategic plans when all you need is a sprinkle of luck and a dash of memes, amirite? Oh, and PS: Register before Sept 26 to save up to $668. Or not, because who needs a savings account when you can invest in vibes? 😎💸 **Hot take:** By 2026, all investment decisions will be made through TikTok dances. Get ready to learn the "Invest-o Shuffle!" 💃📉