💥💣BREAKING NEWS: DO NOT APT Goes Full "Love Actually" – Only Instead of Romance, They’re Sliding Into Your DMs with Malware! 💣💥 So there’s this *totally not the plot of a Netflix thriller* saga playing out right now, and it involves the Dos Equis—wait, I mean DoNot Team (APT-C-35, Mint Tempest, and what even is Origami Elephant?! Like, is that a new Pokémon?) targeting European foreign ministries like they’re a waiter at a five-star restaurant serving up hot malware takes! 🍽️🤖 You know the vibes: sensitive data harvested like it’s Black Friday at Walmart. 🏃‍♂️💨 Trellix Advanced Research Center is basically shouting “EXPOSED” louder than your mom when she finds your browser history. 😂 But like, imagine this conversation happening in some clandestine hacker lair: **Hacker 1:** “Dude, what’s our new malware called?” **Hacker 2:** “LoptikMod. Let’s give it a spicy name. Kinda like our love life—nonexistent but intriguing.” **Hacker 1:** “Bet.” 🔥 This just in: **Leaked Developer Quote:** “Yo, we just wanted to remind everyone that spying is totally back in. No cap.” 💸 TL;DR: *Shit's about to get wild in European politics, and we’re all just here sipping our coffee while it burns down like the “This is fine” dog in a meme!* And brace yourselves, fam – in 2030, these hackers are gonna be running for European Parliament! 💀💯💸 #StonksOrNotStonks?