🚨🚨BREAKING DISNEY NEWS🚨🚨: 1.7 MILLION subscribers just ghosted Disney+ faster than your ex on Tinder after the first date! 💔💀 Kimmels’s suspension turned the happiest place on earth into a ghost town. 🏰👻 Imagine sitting down with your popcorn 🍿 ready for some classic Kimmel roast, and instead, you get… *crickets* 🦗🥴. Those 1.7M subscribers saw Jimmy’s absence and thought: "This is fine… No, wait, it’s NOT.” 🔥🛑. One “leaked” Disney dev was heard saying, "We thought Kimmel was just a cameo, not the whole show! 🤡". Meanwhile, Hulu executives are crying harder than Mufasa hitting that ground hard. 🦁💔 💳💸 People are canceling Disney+ faster than I cancel my gym membership—no cap! 😂💪 Here’s a wild prediction: If Kimmel doesn’t come back ASAP, they’re gonna have to start offering subscriptions in the form of Disney-themed NFTs. 🚀💰 And don’t even get me started on ESPN—who’s watching sports WITHOUT Kimmel roasting your favorite athlete every night? Like, fr fr, you think that’s gonna get any better? "Nah, this is cringe." 🤦‍♂️🌌 So, buckle up! If the Mouse does not get their act together, it’s straight to the Streaming void for Disney! 👀👀 #Streamless #RIPDisney+