🚨BREAKING NEWS: The DHS Just Declared War on Skateboards and TikTokers! 🚨💀 In a twist that even M. Night Shyamalan couldn't script, the Department of Homeland Security has officially categorized skateboarding and LIVESTREAMING as "violent tactics" during protests! 🤡💥 YUP, you heard that right! Just practicing your ollies? ROASTED! 📉🤷‍♂️ DHS agents must be sipping on that "we hate fun" juice🍵 because they're treating everyday activities like they’re weapons of mass destruction. Like, c'mon fam, what next? *Wearing hoodies?* That's a crime against fashion! 😱🔥 Imagine a cop rolling up on you, pointing their finger like Drake: "You need to chill! That 'sick trick' looks a little too 'threatening' to me." 🚓👮‍♂️😂 “Fr fr, we can’t have people living their best lives!” said an *anonymous* source (a.k.a., a squad of Karens). "Next, they're gonna catalog sippin' coffee as a riot tactic." ☕️💀 So grab your protest signs and your GoPro, because apparently DEATH BY SKATEBOARD is on the menu now! Hold up, I can see it now: "Do not livestream or you may be deemed a domestic terrorist!" 💸😳 🔥HOT TAKE: In 2024, we'll be arresting people for enjoying ice cream cones at peaceful rallies. Mark my words! 🍦🚀