🚨💰💩🎉 Hold onto your crypto wallets, fam, ‘cause we’re diving headfirst into the wild world of blockchain bamboozles! 🤡👽 Forget the moon landing, we’re about to blast off into the land of LED-tied ties and Trump-bucks! 🚀🇺🇸 🎩 So, what’s the tea? The House passed bills that’ll legitimize digital coins like you legitimize your friend’s terrible taste in music. 📉🤦‍♂️ *According to an anonymous source at CryptoCorp, “We thought we were investing in digital gold, but turns out we’re just buying overpriced MAGA hats with a side of stonks!”* 🧢💸 🤠 Meanwhile, critics are screaming "this is fine" as the financial system might as well be a house on fire 🔥 while we roast some marshmallows with the Trump family marshmallows. "High-key cringe, low-key coping" as the kids say. 🎉 Just remember: If you thought NFTs were a scam, wait ‘til you see the “Trump could be rich again” coin—buy in at your own risk! 🌈💵 🔥 UNHINGED PREDICTION: In 2024, we’ll all be trading crypto for our actual jobs, while Congress tries to monetize cat memes! I mean 🤷‍♂️… Who needs a stable economy when you have cute kittens??? Meow this is fine! 🐾💥