🚨🚨 BREAKING NEWS: CoreWeave just hit us with the juiciest of rollercoaster reports! 🎢💰 Q3 REVENUE UP 134%, but still managed to drop a smooth $110M net loss like it’s hot! 🔥💀 I mean, what’s the vibe? Is it stonks or is it just cringe? 🤷‍♂️💸 So, here’s the tea: they flexed a whopping $1.36B revenue (we see you, CoreWeave 👀), but forecasted that FY revenue is about to hit us with a *no cap* lower estimate. Investors after hearing this: Drake: *Points left, points right* “This is fine” meme playing in the background. 😬😂 Imagine being the devs at CoreWeave: 👨‍💻 “So we basically made a lot of money but still managed to lose like a bad poker player?” 🃏 👩‍💻 "Yep, welcome to tech bro life, where we classify ALL losses as investments!” 🤑 In after-hours trading, CRWV dropped 5%+ like a hot potato 🍟, and I’m sitting here sipping tea, watching the chaos unfold. 🔥 UNHINGED PREDICTION ALERT 🔥: CoreWeave will rebrand as "CoreSnafu" in 2024 and launch a new line of AI that specializes in losing more money than any startup ever! 🤖💸 Will they rise like a phoenix or crash like my WiFi during a Zoom call? Share this hot mess or be forever lost in the matrix! 🤯💥