🚨 BREAKING: I TRIED TO CHARGE MY iPHONE LIKE A GOOD LITTLE APPLE FANBOY FOR 2 YEARS AND NOW I’M PAYING THE PRICE! 🍏🔥 So, I did the unthinkable, fam. I charged my iPhone the “Apple way” for TWO FREAKING YEARS. 🕰️ Guess what? My battery’s now in worse shape than your uncle after a night out. 🥴💀 We're talking “This is fine” levels of tragic! 😂 But wait, what’s ZDNET saying about this epic fail? 🤔 Apparently, they’ve been gathering data like they’re preparing for an Apple court case, diving deep into the abyss of customer reviews while roasting the stonks outta poorly made batteries! 📉💔 🐒 *“We might as well sell the customers a battery replacement plan at this point,”* one imaginary Apple engineer whispered while sipping overpriced coffee. ☕️💰 No cap, if my phone could talk, it’d be like Drake pointing at my poor choices and saying: “This is CRINGE!” 😬🚫 🔥 Hot take: Apple’s next iPhone will come with an “auto-charging” feature – which means it will charge for 2 hours and then quit like your last relationship. 💔🤖 Who’s ready for the chaos?! 🤡🚀 Share this before the battery explodes! 💥