🚨🎉 HOLY CHAINGUARD, BATMAN! 🚀💰 They just pulled in a whopping $280 MILLION in funding! That's right, $280M! Stonks, baby! 📈💵 Meanwhile, our trust in open-source software just shot up faster than Elon Musk on caffeine! 🤖☕️ Chainguard Inc., aka the “Fort Knox” of code, is out here promising to make open-source as trustworthy as your grandma’s cookie recipe! 🍪😜 📅 Founded in 2021—because obviously, the world needed yet another reason to throw cash at code nerds—this company is all about “keeping your software safe” while you sip that overpriced oat milk latte. ☕️✨ Fake Developer Quote Alert! 🚨 “Honestly, we just want to make sure your apps don’t get hacked like that one time my mom clicked on a phishing email! 😂” – Actual Chainguard dev to his friend while dodging responsibilities. But let's be real: Is open-source just a fancy way of us saying “I hope this doesn't implode?” 🤔💥 💥🔥 So here’s my hot take: In 5 years, we’ll all be living in a world where every app just comes with a “DON’T CLICK” button, and Chainguard is the overlord of software safety! 👑😱 THIS IS FINE. Time to strap in; it’s gonna get wild, folks! 🌌💣 #Chainguard #OpenSource #FundingFrenzy