🎉💔 *BREAKING NEWS IN A WORLD THAT'S UNQUESTIONABLY FINE* 💔🎉 Core Devices CEO Eric Migicovsky just dropped the BOOMERANG of tech updates with the *Pebble Time 2*! 🚀 You heard that right - FOUR whole colors! 🎨 Four colors! That's like, one color for each mood you have while waiting in line for avocado toast! 🥑💀 👀 Say "bye-bye" to your boring life with a *1.5” e-paper display* that’s basically just like looking at the back of your old iPhone with a nice RGB glow, because obviously, we need fancy colors when we’re too busy scrolling our existential dread into the abyss! 🔥💾 🔥 But wait! *30-day battery life?!* Are they secretly powered by the energy of procrastination or the tears of unpaid interns? Either way, last longer than that relationship you had when you were 18, fam! 💔💰 Fake developer quote alert 🚨: “We just wanted to give people a reason to look at their wrist instead of their screens. Cope and seethe, Apple Watch!” - Eric Migicovsky, probably. 🥴 Brace yourself for this unhinged prediction: Within the next 5 years, *every* person will be wearing smartwatches and the ONLY apps will be *Gamer Boyfriend Simulator* and *Call Your Mom* 🤡📱. The future is bleak, but the memes will be *lit*! 💥🔥 Share this madness!