🚨👩‍⚕️ BREAKING: *New CEO of CDC Just Dropped; FDA Vaccine Guy Said “I’m Outta Here”!!!* 🤡💉💥 Hold UP! The CDC just got itself a new captain, folks! 🚢 Say hello to Dr. Susan Monarez—who’s apparently never met a medical degree she liked, because since 1953, we've been running this ship with actual doctors. But now? Nah fam, we’re rolling with a PhD in microbiology and immunology! 📜🧪 #Based In a nail-biter vote of 51-47 🎉, the Senate confirmed her like she's a new TikTok trend, and let’s be real, they probably had to scroll through 97-page memes to seal the deal. 🥴💀 Meanwhile, Vinay Prasad—FDA’s GOAT of vaccines—just waved goodbye, dropping the mic like, "deuces, I'm NOT dealing with this chaotic energy!" 😤✌️ “Honestly, I’m just here for the stonks,” said *some imaginary FDA intern* who totally exists. 📈🔥 So, what’s next? Is the CDC gonna drop a merch collab with the vaccine? “Vax on, vax off”? 💸🚀 Unhinged prediction: In 2024, the CDC will announce a partnership with TikTok for health tips via viral dance challenges. Get your vaccine shots and your grooves ON—this is fine! 🕺💃 #HealthTok 🤖💰