🚨📢 CHONKY NEWS ALERT! 🚨📢 Bungie just pulled a wild *“look over here”* move, opening up applications for an ultra-secret, invite-only technical test of Marathon! 💀✨ Like, are they expecting us to drop everything for a game that’s been tossed around like a salad at brunch? 🍳🥗 #Cringe From Oct 22-28, if you’re lucky enough to wear the exclusive “non-disclosure” blindfold, you’ll be playing a game that’s been delayed longer than my motivation to go to the gym 🏋️‍♂️. This game was initially due in SEPTEMBER 2025, but now? IDK fam, they’ve slapped an “indefinite” delay sticker on it 🚫⏳. Here’s a leaked convo between Bungie devs, or whatever their mastermind dungeon is called: 👨‍💻 DEV 1: “So, we’re still working on Marathon?” 👨‍💻 DEV 2: “Yeah, but we also just broke our promise to players. 🙃” 👨‍💻 DEV 1: “This is fine.” 💩 Might as well grab some popcorn and watch the chaos unfold while we pray to the gaming gods for an actual release date. 🍿🤖 This is the *“stonks”* meme of gaming right now, and the stock? 💰🚀 *Not even listed.* 🔮 Prediction: By the time Marathon drops, we’ll all be in VR chat living our best lives while Bungie’s like, “Surprise! Here’s Marathon on the new GameBoy Color!” 🤡🔥 BRB crying in the corner while waiting 4 life.