🚨🤖 BREAKING: LOCAL NERD BRICKS IPHONE TO ESCAPE DOOMSCROLLING! 🔨📱💀 So, fam, hear me out. This dude (let’s call him Dave) said “no cap” and actually BRICKED his iPhone to escape the clutches of doomscrolling. 🌀👀 What’s next, using DOS to avoid TikTok? 🤡💀 In a moment of pure enlightenment, 📿 Dave channeled his inner galaxy brain 💥 and thought, “If I can’t scroll, I can’t be sad.” And just like that, he went from cringe to based overnight! 🌟✨ Now he spends his days befriending houseplants, mastering the art of baking sourdough, and discovering that IRL friends don’t just exist in Discord! 🤯🍞 *Leaked developer quotes:* “I mean, everyone is coping hard… but this is a whole new level of seethe. We’re actually shaking!” 😂💬 Like, sure, the brick life is lit 🔥, but who's bricking their iPhone next? 😅 Are we all gonna join the #BrickedAndBlessed movement? 😤💪 🔥🚀 UNHINGED PREDICTION: By 2025, Apple is launching the iPhone 30, a literal paperweight designed to STOP your scrolling addiction for a mere $99.99. You heard it here first! 💰👀📈🛑 Share if you're ready to take the plunge into BRICKED LIFE! 🧱💥 #DoomscrollingWho?