🚨💰BREAKING: Chuck Schwab is about to put the pedal to the metal and snag Forge Global for a hefty $600M!! 🤑💸 Y’all remember when $600M used to be a lot of money? 😂 Welcome to 2023 where that’s basically couch change for big banks and high-key investors like we’re at a yard sale for stonks! 💀🪙 But hold up—what even IS Forge Global? 🤔 Well, buckle up, fam, it's basically the VIP lounge for trading private startup stakes! Think of it like that club where all the cool kids hang out, and you're just outside looking in, trying to dance to the Spotify playlist of valuations soaring higher than Elon Musk’s ego! 🚀👽 Totally leaked developer quote from some imaginary insider: “We’re basically playing Monopoly but with real money and tears. 💔🕹️” and can we talk about how Charles Schwab's just vibing while everyone else is seething in the crypto crash aftermath like *this is fine* meme? 🔥🤣 So, what’s the hot take, you ask? 🌡️ Well, I’m calling it now: in 2024, Chuck Schwab will try to acquire the entire moon just to eliminate competition. Why invest in companies when you can own the whole celestial body? 🌌🛸💥 Share this if you agree or your crypto portfolio is likely a meme now! #SorryNotSorry