🚨 Apple is BACK at it again with the product parade—except this time they're flexing like it's 2026 and the market is ready for a *low-end* iPhone! 🎉📱 Sources (aka that dude at the coffee shop named Mark 👀) say Apple’s cooking up some spicy new M5 MacBook Pros and A Airs. Why? Because M4s got too comfy and Apple needs to remind us who runs the tech game, fr fr! 🤡🚀 But wait, there’s more! A brand new external monitor! 🖥️ (translation: a screen that costs more than your rent but displays the same cat memes as your old one). And let’s not forget about the iPad refresh; they’re dropping M4 iPads like it’s hot! 💸🤖 “But why low-end iPads?” one confused intern asked. The dev replied, “Because we need to *cope* with that sweet, sweet margin juice!” 😂🗣️ In case you weren’t already seething in jealousy, brace yourself for the iPhone 17e—because who wouldn’t want more letters in their phone name? 📞💀 So here’s my unhinged prediction: By 2026, Apple will have evolved into a skin-care brand for your devices, and we'll all be rubbing a MacBook serum on our faces like “this is fine.” Get ready, stonks 👀📈—the next skincare rave is gonna be lit! 🔥💰