🔮🍎 YO, SQUAD! 🤡💀 BREAKING: Apple just dropped a bombshell so heavy it needs an AirTag just to stay afloat! 💥🚫🛫 Sources say the iPhone Air 2.0, originally set to bless our lives in FALL 2026, is officially getting the vibes of a sad puppy. 🐶👉🛏️ Why, you ask? Because the FIRST iPhone Air sold like avocados at a hipster brunch—LOW. 🥑💔 Like, I mean, good luck selling a sliver of phone when you can barely take a selfie without it turning into a potato—NO CAP! 🍟📸 Rumor has it, Apple engineers are huddled in a basement drinking overpriced artisanal coffee and saying, *"If we can't sell 'em, we should DELAY 'EM!"* 🤷‍♂️☕️ That's right, boys, the craftsmanship of making a phone so thin it might as well be a credit card isn't even hitting numbers! Meanwhile, Tim Cook is probably like, "THIS IS FINE" while seething in his Golden Retriever pajamas. 🐕💰 In a plot twist, I predict Apple will launch an "iPhone Air 3: Now with More Air" and price it at $2,999.99 just to make the minimalist lifestyle trendy again! 👽🔥 So buckle up, fam; the tech world is all just one big game of stonks and "who can delay longer." 🚀💸 #AppleLosingAir #iCryNow #FrFr 🤖💔