🍏🔔**BREAKING: APPLE’S Q3 EARNINGS — THE DRAMA UNFOLDS!** 🔔🍏 Ladies and gentle-peeps, grab your popcorn because 🍿 IT'S ABOUT TO GO DOWN! Apple just hit us with the news that they're dropping their Q3 2025 earnings results on July 31st — that's right, pencil it in your calendar or use your iPhone even tho you probably won’t remember 👀. Imagine Tim Cook sitting in the boardroom like a meme lord, scrolling through spreadsheets while the execs do their best "this is fine" impression as sales numbers drop faster than your favorite TikTok trend! 😱🔥 **Fake Developer Quote:** "Honestly, we just put a shiny new sticker on last year's iPhone and called it 'Innovation'." 🤖💬 So what can we expect? 🤔 Stonks to the MOON 🚀 or is it gonna be a hard *seethe* moment for Apple investors? Just picture Drake like 👎 for those “meh” numbers. ✨ PRO TIP: Be on the lookout for an *insider* leak where a mysterious source claims Apple is releasing *the iToaster*, a revolutionary gadget that toasts your bread AND can FaceTime your grandma! **UNHINGED PREDICTION:** If the earnings report doesn’t include a new emoji, I’m convinced the world ends that day. 💀💯 Keep your memes close and your stocks closer! ✌️💸