🚀💥🔥 Hold onto your helmets, space nerds! Boeing’s Starliner is about to make the most epic NOT-a-human trip into the great beyond, and guess what? 🤡 It’s just cargo, baby! That's right, stardust enthusiasts – after some “minor” *malfunctions* that left astronauts playing a game of cosmic Hide-and-Seek with the ISS, NASA said, “Nah, fam, let’s not risk it.” 🚫👨‍🚀 So now, the only thing hitching a ride on the Starliner is good ol’ space stuff! Imagine a lonely bag of chips floating around, like 😳 "Is this what my life has come to?" Meanwhile, Boeing's devs are probably sitting back, coping and seething. 🤔💭 One anonymous (definitely real) developer was overheard saying, “We’re basically just an Amazon Prime delivery service for space junk. Next thing you know, we’ll be selling space burritos.” 🌯✨ And don’t get me started on the “rigorous testing” that’ll take place before they throw humans at this thing again. You know they’ll just drop it from the stratosphere and say, “Well, it didn’t explode this time!” 😂 🔥🔥 HOT TAKE: When they finally do test it with humans, it’ll be a live-streaming reality show called “Starliner: Space Edition,” where contestants dodge meteors for a million-dollar stonk prize! 💰🚀 Just remember, space is full of surprises, but Boeing's track record is still a cosmic joke. 💀👽 Share if you know this is all just a setup for a comedy special!