🚨💥 BREAKING: Bluesky pulls out the age verification SHOVEL 🚧 to dig itself out of the UK Online Safety Act grave! 💀💀💀 Forget "Are you 18+?"—now you gotta face-scan and present a government ID like you're trying to buy a bottle of wine 🍷, not just scroll memes and epically dunk on Zoomers. *Leaked Quotes from Bluesky Devs*: "We just wanted to create a safe space, but now it feels like a 'This is fine' meme 🔥 in a burning room of BIG BROTHER vibes!" 🤖 Stonks? More like stinky! 📉 If you're under 18, prepare to be restricted, like trying to play Fortnite without a Battle Pass. "Sorry kid, no DMs for you! Go play with your Lego!" 🤡🛑 Also, shout out to Kid Web Services (aka Epic Games) for trying to make us feel safe while cozying up to that sweet, sweet data 🍭💰. But who knew age verification was the new must-have feature for tech platforms? Thank you, *Online Safety Act*, for the cringe-shield! 🚀 **Hot Take:** By 2025, Bluesky will lead the way as everyone's favorite social media platform FOR KIDS ONLY, where the adult content is as limited as my patience for small talk.🥳 Stay tuned, fam! 🤪🚀 #AgeVerification #TheNextGenOfMemeFiesta