🚨🔊 *BREAKING NEWS, TECH NERDS AND APPLE FANBOYS* 🔊🚨 Tim Cook just dropped a $100 billion bombshell 💰💣 while standing next to President Trump like he’s about to bless us with the next iPhone’s baked potato feature 🥔📱. That’s right, fam! Apple’s about to sprinkle another 100 LARGE into U.S. manufacturing! 🍎🍔 But WAIT—hold the stonks! This doesn’t mean your next iPhone will be 100% made in America. Nah, fam, it’s still gonna be more assembled by kids in a distant land than by good ol’ Uncle Sam. 😭👷‍♂️ Leaked quote from a "Apple engineer" 🤖🔧: “We just can’t resist those sweet, sweet sweatshop prices! It’s like comparing premium avocado toast to a ham sandwich.” 🥑🍞💀 Meanwhile, Apple’s already preparing for the epic backlash with their signature “this is fine” dog meme 🐶🔥 as if they can COPE with our seething rage. So, will this create 20,000 new jobs? Sure, if you count the new positions for “people who will assemble charging cables that break instantly.” 😅🔌 **Prediction:** By 2025, Apple will "accidentally" discover a way to make their next iPhone out of recycled AirPods. You heard it here first! 🚀👽✨ #AppleIsWeird