🚨🚨 BREAKING NEWS ALERT 🚨🚨 Apple is about to drop their Q4 2025 earnings like it’s a new iPhone (spoiler: it’s just more money 💰💰)! So, grab your wet wipes ‘cause we’re about to wipe those boring numbers off the charts!! 📈🔥 The stock market be like: "If I had a nickel for every time Apple announced their earnings, I'd invest in Apple." 😂 #Stonks! But for REAL, here’s how to get in on the action without falling asleep: 🥱👇 🕑 Tune in today at 2 PM PT / 5 PM ET as Tim Cook shares the most riveting news since the last launch event that had the same 5 colors of iPhones. #GalaxyBrain 🤯 And word on the street from a "leaked" developer 🙈: “We’re just gonna keep repackaging the same product until they ALL buy it again. Y’all are addicted! No cap.” So grab your popcorn 🍿 and prepare to watch Apple unveil their latest cash-grab in real-time! And let’s be honest, this is fine (if you’re a shareholder or a masochist). 🔥🚀 HOT TAKE: By Q4 2026, Apple will have turned every tree into a charging station PLUS a new Apple Watch that doubles as a toaster! Don’t sleep on this one, fam! 😤💯