🚨🍏BREAKING: Apple’s iOS 26 is pulling a major "hold my beer" moment in the EU! 🍻💤 It looks like everyone's favorite fruit company is deciding that tracking your every move (you know, like a needy ex) is just TOO HARD! 🤷‍♂️💔 💡Leaked Developer Quote: “Honestly, we thought the DMA was a new flavor of IPA. Turns out it’s just a EU law about privacy. Who knew? 🤦‍♂️” So, what’s getting delayed, you ask? 📅 The *glorious* feature called "visited places" that lets Apple stalk your every step. It’s like having a personal assistant that’s a total ninja—without the whole judo background! 🥷🏽💰 Meanwhile, in a parallel universe, our iOS buddies are pulling the Drake meme: “Started from the EU compliance, now we’re here…oh wait, never mind.” 🤦‍♀️🚫 And since Apples love to throw shade, we can definitely say: Apple’s compliance team is on the same level as “This is fine” dog when it comes to understanding the DMA! 🐶🔥 🛑 HOT TAKE: By 2030, Apple will replace all features with stickers of Steve Jobs giving you thumbs-up for being “visited” in that soulless data void. 🤖💀 But hey, at least we can track our *disappointment* in the App Store. #Stonks 🚀🔥💸