🚨🔥BREAKING NEWS: Apple’s Blood Oxygen feature is BACK, baby! 🚀💉💀 After a dramatic saga that had lawyers making MORE moves than an Olympian, the stonks are officially pumping again! 📈💰 In a blog post that reads like grandma’s diary when she meets a new bingo club, Apple just casually dropped that the Blood O₂ sensor is strapping back on your wrist like it never left! 🕵️‍♂️📅 #DramaAlert #Throwback But wait, there’s a catch! You gotta update your phone to iOS 18.6.1 and your watch to watchOS 11.6.1! 😳 **Update or die trying.** And speaking of dying, “When my just-updated Apple Watch told me I was 97% human, I wept,” said no one ever. 🤥💔 Meanwhile, Masimo is probably plotting an elaborate revenge plan in the darkness like: “We’ll be back” - in an *ominous voice.* 😈💼 But here’s the real flex: once you’ve synced up and tested your blood oxygen, you can totally flex on your friends. “Bro, my levels are like my Netflix subscriptions: ALWAYS FLUXING!” 😂🔥 🔥🔥HOT TAKE: Within a month, Apple’s gonna drop an “Apple Watch Plus Ultra X Blood-Tracker 3000 NEO Y2K Edition” with a built-in toaster and the ability to measure your mood by scanning your texts! 🤯💥 **It’s inevitable, no cap.**