🚨📱🍏 **BREAKING: Apple Store Employees Find Cure for Scratched iPhone 17 Displays!** 🍏📱🚨 Listen up, fam! It seems like the crew at the nearest Apple Store is donning their lab coats, cooking up some protective wizardry to combat the tragic fate of iPhone 17 scratches. 😱💔 **Step 1**: They’ve decided to literally wrap the display units in bubble wrap! No cap, they're taking “fragile” to a whole new level! 🧙‍♂️🤪 Imagine trying to flex your new phone while looking like you just took a bubble bath... And yes, the poppability is a strong 10/10. 🤡🍾 **Step 2**: They’re slapping on some “high-tech” screen protectors that probably cost more than your life savings. 💸💀 “But hey,” said an *imaginary* Apple engineer named Steve, “if it saves you from scratches, it’s basically a stonks move!” 📈🔥 Drake is pointing at that cringe design choice like, “Who approved this?” 😳👀 But here’s the kicker: By 2030, Apple will require you to wear a bubble suit just to enter the store. 🤖🛡️ *This is fine* as long as they keep the AirPods drop-proof! So buckle up, because if trends continue like this, we’re gonna need a battle plan for the next iPhone release. Get ready for the iBubble 18, where they literally encase you in tech! 🤯🚀 Your phones are now made of marshmallows... What could go wrong? 😅🤷‍♂️💥