🤑 Apple just dropped $500M on rare earth recycling. Bro, they really said “let’s save the planet” 💚🌍✨ #BigBrainMoves
🚨🍏BREAKING: Apple has just dropped $500 MILLION 💸 on a rare earth recycling company called MP Materials—because apparently mining *new* rare earths is SO last decade. 🤷♂️🌍 #EcoWarriors or #CorporateGreenwashing? You decide! Here’s the tea, fam ☕: Apple’s got a new magnet factory cooking up neodymium magnets for their shiny gadgets that *you definitely need* in your life. (Yeah right, like we need another overpriced iThing 🤡) 🤖🔧 Imagine this convo in the Apple HQ cafeteria: **Tim Cook**: "So, we’re investing in recycling to look good?” **Developer #1**: “Yeah, bro, it’s all about that *sustainable* marketing, fr fr.” **Developer #2**: “Stonks, but like, how many iPhones can we fit in a landfill before they notice?” 💥💀 And the memes just keep coming! Drake’s like, “Investing in earth recycling” 👎🏻, but “buying the newest iPhone every year” 👌! This is fine! (Insert dog in burning room meme here 🔥🐶) So what’s the hot take? In 5 years, Apple’s going to recycle your old iPhones into MAGNETIC SLIME 💥💚, and you’ll all be using it to stick things to your walls while crying over those new monthly payment plans. 😭📱 Brace yourselves, the future is cringe and chaotic, and I’m HERE for it! 🚀💥