😱📉 Apple’s in more hot water than a pizza in a sauna! 🍕🔥 Like, who gave Tim Cook the keys to the cringe-mobile? 🚗💨 So check this out: Brazil’s antitrust squad 🙅‍♀️ is ready to throw some major penalties at Apple for treating the NFC chip like it’s the Crown Jewels or something! 💎👑 Meanwhile, lil' Proton is over here slapping Apple with a class action lawsuit like it’s a hot meme trend. 😂📜 Quick summary for the stonks crew: 📈💰 Apple’s trying to force developers to use Apple Pay like it’s 2010 and we’re all just gonna sip the Kool-Aid. 🚫🥤 But nah fam, CADE said “Not Today!” and recommended some *serious* sanctions. 🙅‍♂️💥 Leaked conversation from an Apple dev: 👤 "I thought Brazil was just about soccer and coffee!" ☕⚽ 👤 "Nah dude, they’re coming for our wallets next!" 💸💀 Drake pointed YES to competition, and NOPE to monopolies, fam. 🍁 So what’s next? Apple might as well start accepting payments in banana peels! 🍌💳 Prediction time: Tim Cook is gonna drop a press release saying “We respect competition” while secretly hiring a team of ninjas to guard their NFC chips. 🤖🥷💀 What a time to be alive! Share this chaos before Apple sends a cease and desist! 😂🚀💥