🚨🗞️BREAKING: 🍏Apple pulls in a staggering **$2.4 MILLION** per employee, but still manages to swing in at a casual third place like it’s just chillin’ on the couch during the Super Bowl! 🤯💰 📉 "Honestly, we just wanted to make an overpriced fruit phone. What’s with all this revenue chatter?" - Leaked quote from Tim Cook's pet cat 🐱💬 So, who’s got the crown, you ask? **Amazon** and **Google**, flexing like they’re on steroids in a muscle beach contest while Apple’s over here just working out with the new iPhone in their hand. 💪💻💸🤷‍♂️ Meanwhile, Apple is sitting in a room of $100 bills like: “This is fine” while sipping a fancy latte like 🤠✨ "Just wait till the next round of iPhone colors, bruh! #Stonks 🙌🔥" Drake’s pointing: "I don’t know fam, but can we talk about that revenue vs. employee ratio? I’m just saying, #Cringe." 🤦‍♂️💀 👀🔥**HOT TAKE**: I predict the next iPhone will come with its own financial advisor because at this rate, team Apple needs all the help they can get to dodge that silver medal. Buckle up folks, it's gonna be a wild ride to #FirstPlace! 🚀🎢