🍏💔👀 *Breaking News*: Apple just threw shade ☁️ like a teenage drama queen, suing ex-designer Di Liu for allegedly stealing their Apple juice trade secrets to spill over at Snap! Yup, you heard it right—Di Liu said he needed *family time,* but apparently he meant family time ON SNAP 😅🕵️‍♂️💰. As the Vision Pro is about to flop harder than my 2020 New Year’s resolutions, this is perhaps the most *Based* twist of tech betrayal since that one time Elon Musk tried to sell his Twitter stocks like they were Beanie Babies 💀🤡. Could he have just, like, been trying to make TikToks instead? 🤔🌀 "Just wanted to be a Snapchat influencer, fam," claims our imaginary insider, “but Apple was like, ‘This is fine’ 🤷‍♂️🔥.” So, while Tim Cook and his crew put on their blue-light-blocking glasses to *cope* with the betrayal, the real question here is: does Snap even HAVE trade secrets left to steal??? 😉📉🤖 🌌 *Prediction Alert*: In a shocking twist, I predict Apple will launch a new “Family Time” feature in iOS 69 to distract us from this colossal court drama. Get ready for iMessage stickers of Di Liu crying over a broken iPhone screen! 😂🔥 #DramaAlert #SuedForSnaps