🚨 BREAKING NEWS: APPLE SPILLS THE TEA ☕️🍏 - Q3 2025 EARNINGS GONNA BE LIT 🔥🔥 Alright fam, gather 'round because the juicy deets are about to drop! Apple is ready to hit us with their Q3 2025 earnings - and you KNOW they’re flexing on us harder than that one dude who always shows up at the party with a new iPhone EVERY. SINGLE. YEAR! 🤳💸 🕑 Conference call at 2 PM PT / 5 PM ET - it’s basically the Super Bowl for people who wear black turtlenecks and call themselves “tech-savvy.” Don’t miss it if you wanna catch Tim Cook's voice sounding like a smooth blend of a gentle unicorn and the stock market's sweet, sweet sounds of stonks ⬆️📈💰! Leaked quote from an anonymous dev: “If Apple drops anything less than the new iPhone 20 that runs on pure vibes, I'm pulling a Steve Jobs and disappearing into the tech void.” 😂💀 How to listen? Just tune in, sip your overpriced oat milk latte, and brace yourself for some serious corporate jargon (not to mention, a whole bunch of “we're innovating” bull). This is fine. 🐶🔥 Hot take: Apple is low-key gonna announce a new color for the iPhone instead of anything actually groundbreaking, and we’ll all cheer like it’s the second coming of Steve Jobs. #Based 🚀💚 Share this madness! 🥳👉👈