🚨💰BREAKING NEWS: Apono just raised $34 million faster than I can say “cloud privilege sprawl!”🤯💻 So, what's the tea? Apono, the tech equivalent of that kid who brings a salad to a pizza party, is here to fix access management like it’s 1999 and NONE of us were taught how to secure our accounts! 🛡️😅 Their spicy new Zero Standing Privilege model is like that one friend who says “NO” to unnecessary privileges 🔒—just look at them, so responsible! Meanwhile, us? *Insert Drake pointing meme* at the existential crisis of forgetting our passwords! 👑🔑 Imagine this conversation in the Apono dev lounge: Dev 1: “Yo, do we really need to raise $34M for this?” Dev 2: “No cap, bro. We gotta flex on those other cloud platforms like they owe us lunch money! 🤑💸” Apono basically said, "We're here to clean up your mess, cloud overlords!" 🚀💪 But like, will they solve the *REAL* crisis of overflowing email spam? 😂 *cue galaxy brain meme* 🔥🔥HOT TAKE: In 2024, Apono will unleash a “Zero Privilege Pizza” that not only secures your access but also makes your pizza orders. Look out, Domino’s! 🍕👀 *insert stonks meme here* This is fine. 🌈💥 Share if you agree or your privileges will be revoked! 💀🔐