🚨🔊 BREAKING NEWS ALERT: Amazon is snatching up Bee like it’s Black Friday at Target! 🛒💨 Welcome to the digital dystopia, where your wrist is now a tap-dancing surveillance state! 💀🕵️‍♂️ Forget Fitbits that track your steps; we got a snazzy $50 device eavesdropping on ALL your convos! 🥴👂 Imagine this: your *"super private"* chats about how Kevin from accounting smells like stale pizza? 🎤🧀 Now transformed into AI-generated summaries! “Thanks for the intel, Alexa-cessive Knowledge!” 🤖🔥 A leaked developer quote reads: “Yeah, we’re just trying to make eavesdropping stylish. Think of it as ear-candy for your wrist! 🎉 Also, we’d like to 'buzz' about your shopping habits. 😏” 🔥 Let’s be real, Jeff Bezos is playing 4D chess while we’re stuck in a game of Tic-Tac-Toe, praying this device doesn’t become sentient. 🤯 And you thought the Roomba was bad? 😅 Pfft, wait till Bee starts dropping unsolicited advice like “You should really ask Karen out—she’s been talking about you in meetings.” 😳💔 🔥💰 Hot take? In 5 years, this device will have its own reality show: *Keeping Up With the Eavesdroppers*—and we’ll all be glued to it! Fr fr, pack your tinfoil hats, folks! 🛡️💰🚀 #StonksOrNoStonks