🚨📚 *BREAKING NEWS* 📚🚨 Amazon just dropped its October Prime Day book deals like it's a hot mixtape, and let me tell ya, fam, we're talking 📉🎉 up to 65% OFF! That's right, grab those novels faster than your mom grabs the last slice of pizza 🍕 at a family gathering. Like, are we sure this isn't a glitch in the matrix? 😱 'Cuz I just saw “()*&^@#% I GOT THE DEALS” in my sleep. 🤖💤💰 But honestly, with these markdowns, you might just accidentally become a literate person. 🤓 One leaked Amazon developer, Chad747, was heard saying, “If books were stocks, I'd say ‘stonks’ are about to hit the moon 🚀💸!” Meanwhile, Jeff Bezos is probably just standing in a dark room, sipping coffee, thinking about how to turn every library into an Amazon warehouse. This is fine. 🔥 So anyway, get off TikTok scroll for a sec, open that Prime app, and secure your future literary hot takes. Because if you don’t, you’ll be that one friend still using MySpace while the rest of us are vibing in the Metaverse. 🌌😩 🔥🔥 Hot take: By 2025, books will be delivered by drones, and reading will be a competitive e-sport. But like, who really reads anymore? *cringe* 🤡