🚨🤑 BIG NEWS ALERT! Amazon’s about to hit that "terminate" button on the Prime Invitee program, and suddenly you’re gonna need a PhD in Advanced E-commerce Ninja Skills just to dodge shipping fees. 📦💸💥 So here's the tea: no more sharing your Prime like it’s the last slice of pizza at a party. 🍕🤠 Starting NEXT MONTH, the crackdown is coming in hot! What does this mean? If you thought your Hemsworth-level abs could save you from those pesky shipping costs, think again, fam. *Leaked developer quote*: "Honestly, we just want people to feel the PHYSICAL pain of spending money on shipping. It’s like a wake-up call to stop relying on our Prime godliness." 😱💀 Honestly, Amazon's playing chess while we’re all just packing away free shipping like it’s stonks in the bull market. 📈💖 It's okay, just drown your sorrows in Prime Video and pretend you're still winning at life, ‘cause this is fine! 🔥 But mark my words: In the future, one day, we will have to barter with Amazon using our left kidneys just to get that same-day delivery. 👽🚀 I can see it now – "But wait, that kidney is only worth a 48-hour shipping window?! EMERGENCY!" 😂😱 Are you ready, society? Cope and seethe, folks!