🚨🔥**BREAKING: Abridge is now worth more than my entire life savings... combined!**🔥🚨 In just 4 months, this AI medical scribe company has gone from “who dis?” to a whopping 💰$5.3 BILLION💰 like it’s the hottest trending TikTok dance! 😱 Stonks only go up, right? 📈✨ They just bagged a $300 MILL contract from a16z (who's drunk on that venture capital juice 🍷) after already pocketing $250 million earlier this year. Forget doctors scribbling notes like it’s 1999, Abridge is here to save us from ***Dr. AutoCorrect*** ✏️👩‍⚕️, by being the *real MVP* of the medical scribe game. They got in bed with Epic Systems, and honestly, they’re probably sending love letters in the form of data packets at this point. 💌🤖 *Leaked Developer Quote*: “We basically turned writing into an Olympic sport. 🏅 Now all docs do is scroll through TikTok while we make their notes ‘valid.’” This is fine... or is it? 🤔💀 With AI taking over everything, next thing we know, your medical scribe will be making more than you on OnlyFans. 😤💁‍♂️ **Hot Take:** Abridge isn’t just the future, it’s the new doctor. Expect AI heart surgeons by 2025, and they'll be delivering your prescriptions via drone while doing the Renegade. 🚀💊 #AIMedicalTakeover