🚨 BREAKING: Abxylute Is About to Hit Your Wallet with the 3D One Handheld That Costs Less Than Your Rent! 💸💥 😱 You heard it right! We are stepping into the future with a portable gaming PC that’s still not cheap enough for peasants like us — all for the low, low price of “under $1,700.” Like, fr fr, do they think we're made of stonks? 📈💰 Welcome to the tech circus! 🎪 Lenovo went detachable, Acer went big with an 11-inch screen, and now Abxylute is coming out like “hold my overpriced energy drink” and slapping on glasses-free 3D. Y’all remember when that used to be a feature in 90s sci-fi movies? 🚀🔮 🤖 Imagine whipping this beast out at the coffee shop: “What? You’re still playing Candy Crush on your ancient phone? 🤣 Peep my eye-tracking mind-control device!” Yeah, the “Sunday Dragon 3D One” (because “Monday Dragon” was booked 🔥) boasts a 120Hz display and enough power to launch a SpaceX rocket. Some leaked developer quotes from the brainstorming session: 👾 Developer A: "Why not just throw in free ramen too?" 👾 Developer B: "For a $1700 handheld? LMAO, this is fine!" And honestly? This screams “let's see who can cope the hardest when it breaks in 6 months.” Hot take: By 2026, people will be trading old consoles on Tinder like it’s a dating app 😭📱– "Swipe right for nostalgia!"