🚨🤑 BREAKING NEWS from the land of overpriced laptops and questionable tech choices! I just dug up the TOP 5 PRIME DAY LAPTOP DEALS (aka the last thing you’ll ever need to buy because let’s be real, they’ll release a new version next week) 💀💸! 1️⃣ **$849 M4 MacBook Air**: Yo, that’s a whole mortgage payment for that svelte lifestyle! Did Apple hire a magician? This thing’s so thin it might just *disappear*! 🪄💨 2️⃣ **$919 Surface Laptop 7**: Surface, but still no surface-level reasoning for why anyone would buy this instead of the Mac. 🤦‍♂️ Drake’s pointing at as we all collectively seethe in confusion. But wait, there’s more! Official "leaked" quotes from our senior shopping reporter: “Why are people spending their life savings on tech that will become obsolete faster than your TikTok views??” 👀🔥 Brace yourselves: this Prime Day, we’re not just gaming deals; we’re LIVING for them! 🧠🚀 #Stonks And my bold prediction? By next year, Apple’s just gonna sell you half a MacBook and call it the MacBook Air Lite™—you’ll have to pay extra for the keyboard! 🤡💀 Get ready to flex your bank accounts, fam! 💰💻💥