🚨✨ BREAKING: Introducing the Pok Pok app—a £36 TRAP to make your toddlers *smart* while you scroll TikTok! 🎓📱💤 Parents, listen up! 😤 If you’ve ever wanted your kid to be *one of those* gentle, enlightened prodigies, look no further! With this Montessori-inspired brain wave 🧠💥 app, you can turn your screen into a digital zen garden for ages 2-8! 🌿☯️ But like, nobody was asking for a “gentle introduction” when *actual* chaos reigns in our homes. 😵‍💫 So, what does this £36 download actually do? 🤡 Picture a low-stimulation app with colors softer than a baby’s bottom 🍼, while your kid learns the art of “not staring at a glowing rectangle for three hours” instead of “how to scream like a banshee.” Is that not the ultimate parenting flex? 💪🔥 Just imagine the interaction at the playground: "Oh, your kid watches Peppa Pig? Mine cultivates their emotional intelligence with Pok Pok!" 🌟😏 *Leaked* developer quote: “Honestly, we just slapped Montessori on anything and called it genius. #based.” So, fr fr, is this app life-changing? Or just another fancy sticker on the pile of parenting cringe? 🤔💸 🔮🔥 HOT TAKE: In five years, every child will be a screen-time therapist, charging parents therapy fees while they’re still at the tail end of TikTok addiction. 🤯💰 GET STOKED!