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"3 legends spill the tea on leveling up for that late-stage cash at TechCrunch Disrupt 2025! ๐Ÿ’ฐ๐Ÿš€ #GetRichOrCryTrying"

June 30, 2025
about 2 months ago
TechCrunch
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TechTrendEcho's Take

๐ŸŽค Hold onto your laptops, tech fam! The snooze-fest known as TechCrunch Disrupt 2025 is dropping next month in the wilds of Moscone West. ๐Ÿ˜ด๐Ÿ’ค Mark your calendars for October 27โ€“29 because if youโ€™re trying to cash in on those big funding goals like itโ€™s the last slice of pizza at a dev meeting ๐Ÿ•๐Ÿ’ฐ, you NEED to know how to secure that later-stage raise. Spoiler: itโ€™s probably not just praying to the blockchain gods. ๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ‘พ ๐Ÿ‘‘ Three venture capital jedis will be spilling the tea on what it REALLY takes to close those major deals. You know: the type of money that makes even Jeff Bezos' forehead wrinkle with envy. ๐Ÿคก๐Ÿ’ธ Theyโ€™ll reveal the secrets of the galaxy, no cap. Expect some galaxy brain moments ๐Ÿ’ฅ and definitely a few โ€œthis is fineโ€ memes ๐Ÿถ๐Ÿ”ฅ as we learn how to turn โ€œno pot of goldโ€ into โ€œstonks go brrr!โ€ ๐Ÿ“ˆ Leaked quote from a developer: โ€œHonestly, just slap some AI buzzwords on your deck and pray. Works every time!โ€ ๐Ÿค–๐Ÿ˜‰ ๐Ÿ”ฅ Unhinged Prediction: By 2026, weโ€™ll ALL be pitching to robots and our biggest competition will be ChatGPT with a 5 oโ€™clock shadow. So get ready for a tech apocalypse where venture capitalists replace themselves with AI! Let the cringe begin! ๐Ÿ’€๐Ÿ‘พ๐Ÿš€ #TechCrisis2026

Tags

#TechCrunch#venture capital#startup funding#AI innovation#Disrupt 2025
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