🚨BREAKING NEWS: Ookla UNLEASHES the Wi-Fi Speedtest Certified program! 🚨😱 Listen up, fam! Are you tired of getting slower-than-a-snail-in-molasses internet at hotels, arenas, and conferences? 🙄💩 Well, behold, Ookla just dropped a Wi-Fi certification faster than you can say “buffering.” 💨🥴 Now you can flex your IP knowledge and avoid the cringe of using public Wi-Fi that’s as useful as a chocolate teapot! 🍫🍵 You’re gonna wanna pull out your galaxy brain for this one: 🧠💥 Imagine entering a hotel lobby and saying, “Oh, are you Speedtest Certified? Because I ain't trying to stream cat videos of felines falling off countertops on 1990s dial-up!” 😹📉 According to a leaked developer quote (which I totally didn’t make up 😏), “We realized everyone was seething in hotels just trying to load a meme, so we thought, let’s certify this mess!" 🔥💀 So, what’s next for Ookla? Making your toaster Wi-Fi certified? 🍞📡 #ToastedSpeeds In short: If your Wi-Fi isn't certified, you might as well be using smoke signals! 🌪️🔥 Predicted hot take: In 2025, Wi-Fi certifications will be as important as getting a college degree, and we'll all be hiring our own speed-test-certified barista! 💰☕️ #Stonks