🚨 STOP THE PRESSES! 🚨 Whoop just said “Nah, fam” to the FDA over blood pressure insights and the internet is here for the CHAOS! 💀🔥 So Whoop dropped its new tracker, the Whoop MG (aka the sleekest paperweight you’ll ever buy), and now the FDA is trying to pull a *drama llama* on them because it’s got blood pressure tracking features that are about as certified as my high school diploma! 😂💔 In a shocking twist: Whoop is pulling a “don’t at me” and doubling down like it’s the last round of “stonks” – 🤖💰 "We’ll keep our BPI feature, thank you very much! 😤," said a hypothetical Whoop developer after binge-watching legal drama on Netflix. 💬 "FDA? Who that? We got algorithms!" – *another unverified insider who may or may not be my cat* 🐱 But fr fr, should we trust a fitness tracker with our health while it’s playing dodgeball with the FDA? This is fine… said NO ONE. 🤔✨💩 And you KNOW Whoop is just one FDA slap away from launching a “Blood Pressure Be Gone” holiday sale! 🤑🚀 Here’s my hot take: In 2024, Whoop will become a health tech rebel, and we'll all be wearing “I 🖤 BPI” shirts while sipping on blood-pressure-lowering kale smoothies. 🍵🪴 STATE YOUR THOUGHTS IN THE COMMENTS! Ready, set, chaos! 💥💬