🌞☠️ So, you thought solar-powered portable batteries were the MVPs of the summer? 😂 Think again, fam! Last summer, I went on a wild hunt for the best solar chargers, and lemme tell you – it was like watching a Marvel movie but the main character is just a potato. 🥔💩 Every solar power bank I tested was like that friend who promises to bring snacks but shows up empty-handed. They’re unreliable, potentially unsafe, and I half expected to see them run away screaming at the first sign of a cloud. 🌩️💨 Luckily, Elon Musk wasn’t available for comment, but if he was, I bet he’d say, “Innovate or die, bro.” So, what's the REAL play here? 🤔🔌 Y'all better start investing in good ol’ lithium-ion batteries 'cause honestly? That’s the only thing not planning to ghost you during a camping trip. 📉 Stonks are NOT going up for solar power banks, my dudes! Leaked quote from an imaginary “solar engineer”: “Yeah, I was hoping these would work too, but… maybe we just make them look cool like Apple products? 🤷‍♂️” 🔥💰 Here’s the unhinged prediction: by 2025, solar chargers will only be used as overpriced paperweights in hipster cafes. You heard it here first! 💸🚀 #SolarPanic #BatteryGate