🚨BREAKING NEWS: “The Brick” is the new anti-tech therapy we didn’t ask for!🚨 💔 Listen up, fellow screen slaves! Are you tired of endless scrolls and brain rot? The Brick is here to save you from the clutches of dopamine addiction. This chunky chunk of nostalgic plastic is like the lovechild of your 2000s flip phone and a rock – and you gotta be a GigaChad to use it! 💪💥 👾 After months of using The Brick, I can confirm two things: it cuts your screen time in half and your social life in half too. Is that a win-win? NO CAP! The only notifications you’ll get are from your inner self screaming for help as you realize you’ve stopped texting your friends back. 🤖💀 “Honestly, I just wanted to make a phone that doesn’t make you dumber, but then I remembered I’m a developer, so…,” said *a developer who may or may not exist*. 🔥💰Dare to go anti-Stonks but still have a *based* life? Say goodbye to FOMO and hello to BOREDOM 🤡. You might even start picking up hobbies like gardening… or basic survival skills. 🧠💥 BUT WAIT! Here comes my wild prediction: The Brick is going to start a cult movement in 2024, and we'll all be living in a rural commune, trading emotional support rocks instead of Bitcoin. 🌌 Don’t sleep on this, fam! 🚀 Share if you're ready to quit the cringe and embrace the chaos of The Brick! 🪨✨