🚨🔥 BREAKING: Your Kitchen’s New Overlord Has Arrived! 🔥🚨 Introducing… 🥁 THE THERMOMIX TM7! 💪💰 The latest robot chef trying to claim the throne of your countertop. For just **$1,699** (because who needs a life savings, amirite? 🤡💸), you can now replace not just your blender but probably your entire kitchen with one mega machine. No cap, it can weigh, chop, steam, whip, sauté, slow cook, and even ferment. Like, is it cooking your food or plotting to take over the world? 🤔🔪 But hold up! This bad boy comes with a whopping **10-inch touchscreen** – bigger than your ex’s ego! 📺👀 It’s powered by MULTI-CORE processing, so you know it’s out here flexin’ on those old kitchen gadgets. 💅 But wait, there’s a catch – the *physical dial* is gone! 😱 Developers were heard muttering, "Guess we’re all touchscreen now, cope and seethe!" 🙃🍵 And if that isn’t enough to make you cringe, you can get access to 200 guided recipes. *But*… only if you cough up another $65/year for your Cookido subscription. Stonks? More like cringe! 📈🚫 So, what’s next? The TM7 is definitely gonna start a cult. 🥳👲🚀 I predict it won’t be long before we see Thermomix TM7 prayer candles lit at farmer's markets worldwide. Get your shades ready, the future’s bright and *steamy*! 💦✨🌍 Share this with your fellow kitchen warriors!!! 🍽️🔥 #ThermomixTakeover #KitchenRevolution