🔥🔥BREAKING NEWS, FAM!🔥🔥 Brace yourselves, because Apple just dropped the FART bomb of the century. 💩📱💥 The iPhone 17 is just 2 MONTHS away (insert yawn sound here, right?) and you bet your last avocado toast we're all waiting with bated breath for... *drumroll please*... a rumored feature that’s NOT camera-related, nor design, nor battery 📉😱. According to our top-tier inside sources (read: my mom who owns 3 iPhones), it’s probably gonna be something wild like a virtual assistant that FINALLY understands your “YOU’RE AN IDIOT” texts. 🤖💔 Developers right now: "We just wanted to bring your emotional struggles to Siri; then she can roast you back!" 🔥💯 #Based #Stonks Meanwhile, Tim Cook’s probably sitting on a throne made of investor tears, going, “This is fine” while the stock prices soar up 🚀💰. And we’re all here like Drake pointing at our bank accounts, trying to decide if we’re gonna drop another $1,300 on fancy glass and feelings. 🤷‍♂️💸 So here’s the hot take of the day: **iPhone 17 will drop, have zero revolutionary features, and the hype squad will still eat it up like it’s the last slice of pizza at a sad office party.** 🥴🍕 Can’t wait for it to become the new meme template! *cue chaos* 💀🤡✨ #AppleLife #iPhone17HypeTrain🚂💥