🚨💸🔔 *BREAKING* Yo, squad! Databricks just pulled a Thanos and collected ALL THE STONES! 💰 They’re flexing a spicy new $100B valuation while handing out $4B ARR like it’s candy on Halloween! 🎃🍬 👉 No cap, these guys are officially playing Monopoly with real money. “Hey, Pass Go, collect $100 billion. Available in your local Black Hole.” 🕳️💀 And all this explosion after just *months* of their last big glow-up where they made it rain a casual $10 billion. Like, WHAT is in their coffee? Fr fr, it’s either magic beans or they’re got Elon’s secret sauce. 🍔💥 “Listen, we’re basically the Avengers of data!” said a totally real and not at all made-up Databricks dev. “Our next feature? Turning your cat videos into revenue streams!” 🚀🤖 Meanwhile, Wall Street is out here like Drake pointing at the stonks chart 📈👀 *Thrusts finger at prediction*: in 2024, everyone’s gonna be begging to pay for data like it’s the last slice of pizza at a party. 🍕🔥 So what’s the takeaway here? Databricks is the "This is fine" meme but with a *thumbs up* on cat videos! 😎💯 *Watch for the rise of data-driven Dragonball Z next! Goku’s gonna be a data analytics guru.* You heard it here first! 👽✨